Our world-weary former food reviewer finds her raison d’être again when she steps back to the place where it all began.

FEELING like a girl on her first date, I poke my head nervously through the door. Could it have been five years already since Braise Worthy, my review of the place?

The faded vinyl covers of Buddy Holly and Frank Sinatra. The framed photos of Ben in motorcycle gear. The same kitschy banners. Nothing seems to have changed – well, give or take a few extra photos on the wall.

Then my wandering eyes rest on the monstrous super-bike taking up at least two tables of space on the right. What the ... !

Special place: Ben Chew, proprietor and cook of Ben’s Diner in Sunway Tunas, Bayan Lepas, Penang.

“That’s Ben’s Chips bike,” grins Mrs Chew as she hurries to the doorway to welcome her two open-mouthed visitors.

“So. This is where it all started eh?” Cha smiles knowingly at me.

For various reasons, Ben’s Diner (43-G, Persiaran Mahsuri 1/1, Sunway Tunas, Bayan Lepas, Penang) would always have a special place in my heart, though sentiment was furthest from my mind when I approached them in 2006.

I had more important priorities to worry about – like where my next meal was coming from. Six months into my shiny new career which I’d dumped a five-figure salary for, I was running out of money and facing mounting bills. Only the thought of admitting that I was a failure prevented me from crawling back into the corporate world with my tail between my legs.

“Why don’t you try food writing?” said Mr T, my then only contact in the media. “There is always a demand for food stories, and you have a knack for stumbling into hidden gems, right? You’ve got to eat, after all.”

It was worth a shot.

After racking my brain, I recalled this charming new diner in Sunway Tunas that Cha and I frequented. The food and atmosphere were superb – the décor and ambience recalled a 50s American diner – but because it was located in a part of town that hadn’t boomed, it had yet to fulfill its potential.

Armed with a paper-thin portfolio, I pitched my proposal to owner-chef Ben Chew with a confidence I didn’t feel at all. To my relief, he immediately invited me to test-drive his new item on Saturday. I had a feeling the braised pork shank would be good when he toted it out of the kitchen looking like a new father showing off his baby.

True enough, the Herculean hunk of velvety meat and marbled fat, served on a bed of creamy mash and fresh salad, was magnificent.

As I literally pigged out, my host entertained me with tasty anecdotes, while his soft-spoken wife listened indulgently. Ben used to ride up and down the American highways; he even did the famed Route 66. All that American paraphernalia began to make sense. As his face lit up like a little boy, I sensed with new insight just how much this diner meant to him.

This mom-and-pop diner was more than a business. I knew what I had to do. The minute I got home, I brewed a pot of strong coffee and wrote like a woman on fire.

One full page with a single photo of his glorious pork shank came out on August 5, 2006. Sometime before lunch, an SMS came in. It had all of one word: “Wunderbar!”

What did it mean? Were there 10 new customers? One... or none at all?

I was a nervous wreck when I went back for a peek the next day. Holy crap. So that’s what a full-page article in the nation’s biggest-selling newspaper can do. Ben and his wife were people of few words, but from their glowing smiles, they were clearly over the moon.

Halfway through our meal, Mrs Chew appeared with a plate of bacon. “Your favourite, right?” she smiled.

The next few times we went, an extra slice of bacon, sausage or garlic toast would mysteriously appear on our plates. I was pleased but embarrassed. Would you please stop doing this? I begged. They would just nod and smile blithely. When I brought my dad there for his birthday, she appeared with a plate of cheese baked oysters and two glasses of red wine.

After that maiden review, I was like a madman, writing food review after food review in succession, longing to relive that first flush of success. They yielded the same kind of results, give or take a dozen or so, but it wasn’t all happy endings.

Two of them, despite the initial tsunami, actually folded. Another favourite coffeeshop dropped their standards to cater to the bigger volume. The last straw was when the stress of running a cafe sparked massive fights between a couple who had become like godparents to me, and they gave up their baby.

I stopped writing food reviews.

Not only that, I avoided returning to places I reviewed because I was too terrified to find out what had become of them. Which was why I hadn’t visited Ben’s for so long, until now.

As we’re tucking in, customers steadily stream in. I relax into my chair, my misgivings slowly receding.

A shadow falls over our table. I look up into the warm eyes of Mrs Chew, who’s holding a plate of the most wonderful-smelling stuff.

“We have no bacon,” she deadpans. “So we got you this instead.”

On it are pork sausages that Ben has sliced thinly, painstakingly, into long ribbons of meat to resemble bacon. They never forgot what I liked. A surge of mixed emotions well up. Guilt, for not coming back earlier, and joy, because they treat me with the same affection that they would accord a family member.

Suddenly, I have trouble swallowing my spaghetti carbonara.

Mrs Chew picks that precise moment to walk past again. “Are you all right? Something wrong with my food?”

I stare back dumbly, too overwhelmed to say anything.

“Nothing wrong with the food,” Cha rescues me. “Alex is just feeling emotional. It’s like,” he darts a glance at me, “coming home.”

Mrs Chew looks visibly relieved. “Ah, I was worried that something was wrong. I will change for you if so. ”

I dig into my spaghetti carbonara with renewed zest. Not just because it is finger-licking good, but because I know that it will nourish my soul. Just like how that first meal of braised pork shank had provided me with the first shot of fuel for my long, difficult but ultimately rewarding journey as a writer.

> Alexandra Wong (bunnysprints.com) would like to offer a toast to all the passionate people out there.

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