Wednesday January 23, 2013
The ties that bind a father and daughter have a far-reaching impact on society.
THE father-daughter relationship is unique and special. This is where the child first learns about males and how they should be treated by them.
Parenting author and trainer Ahmad Fakhri Hamzah feels Malaysians in general have not been very open about this topic; nor have they been taking it seriously.
“The reason why it is such an important topic is because this is the first male-female relationship from the daughter’s perspective.
“So unless both the daughter and father have that strong realisation, it can be a rocky ride,” explains the father of five sons and one daughter.
Often, dads feel it’s okay to let their wife deal with the daughter and the “girly” issues as they feel more comfortable dealing with sons and the boys’ challenges.
“The father might think, ‘I know nuts about girls, so why must I deal with something that I don’t know much about?’
“The impact is indeed far-reaching,” says Ahmad.
He believes that the latest cases of girls eloping with their boyfriends are a reflection of a girl’s under-nurtured relationship with her father.
“Apart from just trying to be what you should be as a father, if you take one step back and look at it, it is also about understanding women.
“Men in general have not known women and they have taken women for granted. I think both parties are naive about each other’s skills,” he says.
Communication and spending time with daughters is vital, says Ahmad.
He admits to having about six to seven channels of communication with his daughter, including on Facebook and her blog. Each channel is used for different types of communication and for different reasons.
Ahmad shares with ParenThots some tips on improving the father-daughter relationship.
There’s A Fly Guy In My Soup by Tedd Arnold has all the ingredients of a successful children’s book – it’s icky, gooey, gross and disgusting. The kids will just love it.
Jake’s Concert Horror is another good story from Ken Spillman; it offers an insight into a boy’s fears on being cast in one of the lead roles in a school play.
Readers write in
One mum writes about using origami to keep her kids occupied on long drives.
Another mum says that parents should take care of themselves, instead of always taking care of others.