Saturday June 17, 2006
Tips for World Cup widows
EVER since the World Cup kicked off on June 9, millions of women across the world have been forced to share their husbands and boyfriends with a seductive rival: football.
It is a testing time but relationships do survive the World Cup. All it takes is skilful tactics and fair play.
Here are eight ways for women to take men on at their own game.
1. Join them: One way not to feel left out is to become a supporter yourself. If you know nothing about football, Soccer Tips for Dummies by Michael Lewis may help you get the hang of the offside rule or try The Thinking Fan’s Guide to the World Cup for some insights on what makes your man tick.
Alternatively, get your partner to talk you through it and explain the rules.
2. Play away: Not infidelity, but finding something else, rather than someone else, to fill that void in your life.
A survey in Britain found that 30% of World Cup widows would rather go shopping, while another 30% said they would prefer a meal with friends.
If you live in Asia where games are on after the shops close, you could try an early night with a good book and earplugs, have a late night out with like-minded friends or retreat to your own space with the DVDs you would never watch together.
3. Play fair: Fair play is all part of “the beautiful game,” which means your partner should know to play by the rules: Letting you do something on your own, or spending a weekend away with the family when the tournament is over.
4. Stand by your fan: Even if you don’t watch, you can cash in on the emotions the game evokes to build a closer relationship.
If your partner’s side loses, be the shoulder for him to cry on and when they win, share in the joy and celebration.
Relationship counsellor Sharon Glick says what you should not do is ignore your partner’s misery if his team loses or tell him not to be so silly. “That’s like pouring oil on fire,” says Glick.
5. Enjoy the spectacle from the sidelines: Even if you find football a real bore, you can still enjoy the festival fever, gossip and human tales of tragedy and triumph.
Go along to a bar screening with your partner and just enjoy the atmosphere.
6. Get the whole team involved: Children too can feel neglected. Make the big matches family events. Encourage the children to watch games, dress in team colours or paint their faces.
Children will love being part of the event with their parents. Plan a football dinner or party. Decorate the house in your team colours and invite football fiends, widows and families over.
7: Don’t cry foul: Dirty play and dramatics is no more appreciated off the pitch than on. Whatever you do, don’t try to win back your partner’s affections by using tactics like temper tantrums, sulks, threats and pulling the plug on the television.
Do that, says Glick, and you may force your partner to seek refuge at a friend’s house or at a bar.
8.The secret is not to worry. If your relationship is good, you have nothing to fear from your partner’s other love. – China Daily / Asia News
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