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Sunday March 15, 2009

Think before you speak

SUNDAY WITH T.SELVA


Thoughts and words can make or break us.

OUR thoughts and speech can work for us or against us depending on what we think and speak. It has tremendous power and it is a tool to either lift us up, pull us down, wound us deeply or heal our hearts.

Our spoken words originate from our thoughts and it is more powerful than our thoughts because they not only affect ourselves, but the people around us.

Another danger about words is that once it is out of our mouth, it can never be taken back and it will have an effect. We may not realise that on many occasions our words are uttered without conscious thought and we also rarely stop and think about what we are saying.

Hundreds of words pour out of our mouths everyday as our thoughts, opinions, judgements and beliefs are freely expressed.

Most of us are also unaware to the positive or negative effect of these words, which has ripple effect on ourselves and those around us.

I write this week’s column following several issues of people speaking ill about others published in the media recently when their relationships turned sour, not realising that they are not only hurting the individual but also themselves. Such personalities should know that they could be fast in saying some unwanted things about a person and regret later but the hurt can be long lasting.

Since ancient times both (thoughts and words) are recognised as the muscle to build lifelong alliances or to start feuds. From young, I have been reminded constantly by my elders to increase pleasant words to clean up my thinking because my words can determine my destiny.

We should always exercise care on the type of thoughts that runs through our mind and the words we utter daily. This is important because the final outcome of what we desire is based on our thought energy and the sweetness of our speech.Everything we say produces an effect in the world and whatever we say to someone else also produce some kind of an effect in that person. In short, we are constantly creating something, either positive or negative with our words and reaction to our words often returns to us in a multiplied form.

Have you realised what have you been saying lately?

Why? This is because it can have a profound effect on the people you are directing it to and it can be your children, spouse, siblings, colleague, friends, clients or business partner.

When we speak unkindly of anyone we are actually creating a negative vibration within us thus harming the harmony of our body, mind and spirit and destroying our self-esteem. Negative talk never help us do anything better other than to just waste our time and energy and disturb our peace of mind.

It is common to find individuals who go on a rage mood often forgetting the happy and good times they had enjoyed or benefited with their close ones. Why this happens is because when you are not in peace with yourself, you will be governed with anger, hatred and unhappiness.

At all times, we should think and analyse before we speak because whatever unpleasant words we say about another individual it is actually a mere reflection of ourselves.

This is because the same fault exists in us and there is no benefit in hurting anyone. Every individual should learn not to follow their whims and start doing or saying anything that comes into their mind. We should exercise our ability to control our mind, be conscious and apply caution on what we want to speak.

One of the best ways to handle issues that cause dislike is to change our thoughts and by doing so, we are actually changing our life for the better.

Next we should view things with compassion because we are all not perfect and we are bound to make some mistakes at some point of time. Remember constant negative speech traps us and prevents us from finding joy, peace, love, happiness and success.

Developing the habit of speaking well of self and others liberate us to enjoy life more and we become a blessing to ourselves and to others.

Guide to positive thoughts and words

  • Avoid gossip and unhealthy talk.
  • Stay away from complaining about others.
  • Look at the good qualities and strength of others.
  • Do not allow unpleasant emotion to control you.
  • Wish others well and avoid holding grudges.
  • Choose to speak words that are uplifting so that you can boost yourself.
  • Use positive spoken and written words to envision success.
  • Successful people take control of their words rather than letting their words control them.
  • Before you speak ask yourself: Is what I am about to say going to uplift, inspire or motivate the listener?
  • The choice of words you use should be in alignment with your vision and dreams to see personal success.

T. Selva will appear live on TRAXXfm, for the TRAXX 101’s motivational segment on ‘The Art of Happy Living”, every last Friday of the month with DJ Jezza.

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