The core concept of Kaigo emphasises self-care in the elderly, to enable them to retain their independence for as long as possible. Photo: 123rf.com
“Pa, let me do that for you.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that. I’ll get it done, just stay put and watch TV, ya.”
“Walking around is such a strain to you, ma – lie down, lie down.”
Do these statements sound familiar to you? Is this the way you show your elderly family members that you care for them? Or rather, is this how care is commonly portrayed through media, family expectations, and cultural teachings? Is this a representation of filial piety?
Families across Asia, including Malaysia, uphold the virtue of filial piety fiercely, especially in aspects of senior care. In our interpretation of filial piety, every single need of the elderly is carefully tended to, down to the smallest details. However, does filial piety stand in the way of allowing the elderly to achieve physical independence in their golden years?
Foundations of filial piety
Xiao, or filial piety, is a virtue of respect for one’s parents, elders and ancestors. Filial piety is demonstrated, in part, through “service” to one’s parents. Despite it being an age-old tradition established 2,500 years ago in China, it is commonly practised across families of diverse races and cultures. It has persisted through time and remains a pillar in many families in Asia.
Families who uphold the value of filial piety often impose it on generations of children, instilling a sense of responsibility that when they are adults, it will be their duty to care for their elders.
Filial piety sets an expectation, across generations, on how to care for the elderly, and what form of care the elderly should receive. This expectation presents itself in forms of assistance in every need and aspect required by an elderly, including and not limited to meals, personal hygiene, entertainment as well as ensuring they live with respect and dignity.
In simpler terms, it is submission to the elderly’s wishes and making sure they live the final years of their lives happily and comfortably.
Masoc Care's Dr Zulkarnain training the public on body mechanics, an integral part of Kaigo, to promote independence among seniors. Photo: Masoc Care
Ageing in place
However, modern philosophies of senior care, especially in Asia, sometimes advocate that we act differently from the teachings and principles of filial piety. Kaigo, or simply the Japanese way of caregiving, is one example. Its core concept of “ageing in place” seeks to emphasise self-care in the elderly, to enable them to retain their independence for longer, and delay the need to live with a caregiver or move into an assisted living institution.
Balancing assistance and independence are essential to Kaigo, in which the elderly are allowed to perform activities of independent daily living to the extent which they can. Assistance is only provided when the elderly are deemed physically unfit to perform tasks; even then, help is collaborative, meaning “help them to help themselves” instead of completing the task for them.
This method of care contrasts greatly with the concept of filial piety.
Picture the elder of the home sitting still in an armchair for nearly 12 hours a day, their gaze locked onto TV dramas, their children attending to them every half an hour, inquiring if they require anything at all, from snacks to massages and everything in between. Mealtimes cater exclusively to their palates, amenities are attentively readied for their personal hygiene needs – all efforts to serve are intended to reduce their workload to the absolute minimum.
This act of love could very well produce the opposite outcome of what we desire for them. The establishment of dependency on their children and caregivers can cause their health to deteriorate in many ways: Physically, from the lack of activity; emotionally, from the lack of independence and autonomy; and psychologically, from daily repetition and an apathetic view towards their retirement years.
Addressing the mismatch
Therefore, discrepancies and conflicts sometimes arise between culture and practicality in senior care. This is an era in which modernisation for the betterment of care goes against traditional teachings, causing a mismatch between expectations and reality.
A deeply ingrained culture must find ways to co-exist and keep up with current times to strive for improvement and progress without losing its identity.
This article was contributed by Masoc Care, a non-governmental organisation that engages youth to be involved and engaged in senior care.
