Growing through heartache


Heartfelt values: Daniel posing with a vase of flowers, symbolising the bittersweet nature of unrequited love.

JUST as a flower may not always be appreciated, one’s love for another may be beautiful but not reciprocated.

One of the best ways to deal with unrequited love is to embrace it as an opportunity for personal growth and introspection, rather than simply viewing it as a negative experience.

Instead of allowing oneself to be consumed by feelings of rejection, one can focus on personal development and self-discovery.

For instance, in my journey, I found solace in exploring my passions and pursuing activities that brought me joy, ultimately leading to a deeper understanding of myself and my values.

Activities such as reading, playing chess and learning foreign languages like Japanese not only provided a coping mechanism for dealing with unrequited love but also revealed concrete avenues for my personal growth.

Through introspection, valuable insights into values, priorities and beliefs about love and relationships can be gained. These include how we should deal with family and friends.

This process empowers individuals to make intentional choices that align with their authentic selves.

Moreover, the journey of unrequited love teaches us the importance of resilience in adversity. While the initial sting of rejection may feel overwhelming, it is through adversity that our true strength and resilience are found.

For example, when I faced rejection, I initially felt devastated but eventually found resilience by embracing the philosophy that “You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free”.

This philosophy encouraged me to release my attachment to the outcome and embrace the beauty of love in all its forms, whether reciprocated or not.

It is crucial to acknowledge the pain and disappointment that come with rejection while recognising the opportunities for growth and self-discovery that lie ahead.

Experiencing sadness and hopelessness when love is unrequited is natural. However, embracing personal growth and resilience is essential to overcoming these feelings. By doing so, individuals can navigate the complexities of unrequited love with grace and strength.

Maintaining friendships even after experiencing unrequited love is also essential for emotional well-being and support.

Instead of allowing rejection to sour relationships, keeping friendships with those we love can provide comfort and strength.

By fostering open communication and mutual respect, individuals can manage the complexities of unrequited love without sacrificing the bonds of friendship that make us human.

In conclusion, unrequited love is a transformative experience that offers valuable lessons in personal growth and resilience if we learn to embrace it.

By focusing on personal development and maintaining friendships, one can emerge from the experience stronger, wiser and more empowered.

Ultimately, embracing the journey of self-discovery and resilience leads to healing and fulfilment, regardless of the outcome of our romantic endeavours.

Daniel, 21, a student in Perak, is a participant of the BRATs Young Journalist Programme run by The Star’s Newspaper-in-Education (Star-NiE) team. For updates on the BRATs programme, go to facebook.com/niebrats.

With the theme of the article in mind, carry out the following English language activities.

1 “You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free” – this saying helped Daniel cope with unrequited love. What are some sayings or quotes you might offer to a friend who is experiencing similar rejection? Using words and pictures from the newspaper, create a collage of inspirational quotes and images that could uplift and support your friend.

2 One’s inability to handle heartbreak can lead to various serious problems, including criminal actions. Find an article in the newspaper that depicts an issue arising from relationship matters, such as a crime or a significant conflict. Discuss with your friend how the situation could have been avoided and the lessons that can be learnt from it.

The Star’s Newspaper-in-Education (Star-NiE) programme promotes the use of English language in primary and secondary schools nationwide. For Star-NiE enquiries, email starnie@thestar.com.my.

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BRATs , Star-NiE , relationships , resilience

   

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