Dr Andrew Mohanraj: Fathers are not only breadwinners but also role models for their children.
ACKNOWLEDGE your emotions and open up.
That is the advice by experts to fathers who are stressed by the challenges of making ends meet in difficult times.
Psychiatrist and Malaysian Mental Health Association (MMHA) president Prof Datuk Dr Andrew Mohanraj says such fathers need to acknowledge and express their emotions rather than suppress them.
“That is the first step in managing them (mental stress) effectively. Fathers should also seek support from others including family members.
“(At the same time) talking about their concerns with trusted friends can provide a sense of relief and perspective.”
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According to Dr Andrew professional support could offer valuable guidance and fathers should focus on matters within their control and develop plans for achievable goals related to their finances.
“Having a clear understanding of their financial situation and making conscious spending decisions can alleviate stress.
“No harm done in consulting a financial expert or seeking professional help to restructure loans.”
He says fathers are not only breadwinners but also role models for their children.
They shape their children’s perception of the world therefore fathers need to prioritise their mental health to contribute to a healthier and happier family”
Mental health counsellor and family dispute resolution practitioner Dr Arman Rashid says undoubtedly, the mental health of fathers would affect the psychological well-being of their entire families.
“Given families are interdependent units with each member affecting one another, fathers facing financial stress need to identify, acknowledge and regulate their emotions and seek professional help if there are deteriorating mental health symptoms.
“This is often difficult for fathers who are forced to conform with social expectations of masculinity as ‘strong’, ‘tough’ and ‘unemotional’ in all circumstances,” he adds.
Dr Arman believes that responsible and loving fathers would be proactive in addressing their emotional distress arising from financial stressors.
“It is okay not to feel okay. this is true for all people and at all times, but particularly so for men during a crisis.
“Instead of bottling up inevitable sadness, frustrations and fears due to financial stress, fathers must be cognizant of their emotional distress to develop healthy coping strategies and seek professional help.
“This will help reduce risks of family violence and parental disengagement affecting children.”
He says fathers who work on their mental health will play a positive role, particularly for their sons.
“In doing so, fathers will educate their children, particularly their sons, in embracing emotional regulation from a young age.
“In addition to seeking professional help, fathers can engage with meaningful activities and adopt healthy eating and exercise.”
There is no reason for fathers to suffer in silence, says Dr Arman.
“Talking about your feelings can help you process your emotions, develop emotional awareness and regulation, and clear your mind to break out of negative thought patterns related to financial stressors.
“This may be an opportunity to relieve some of the financial stressors by sharing emotions and responsibilities with family members, perhaps even rethinking some of the traditional gender norms that put pressure on fathers and force them to bottle up emotions in the first place.”
